Jesus and football

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Greetings on this awesome football day and may the god that I totally fucking believe in bless His Holy God day; I am wearing my magical underwear in case there are those of you who are masturbating right now, so feel free to wank it and slap a dude on the butt!

But hey Seattle fans, Wilson is totally fucking this game up and is putting jizz on the Seahawk’s face!! Jesus must hate these bastards because they are doing worse than a pedophile in general pops! All the Cheese heads have to do is run a schlong right up into the SH ass and totally fuck ’em at this point! Goddamn you Lord for letting Green Bay fuck our boys, if you were a benevolent deity you would let Aaron Rodgers slip on the field onto a stray shampoo bottle and incur an accidental anal tear, but you can’t can you? Because you are a mythological mind fuck, aren’t you? You Jesussy fucktool!

I’m praying to Zeus for the next game you impotent fuckstick, because you fucked me on the lottery numbers AND the Seahawks winning! I hope someone jams a football into your immaculate hooha sideways to teach you a lesson about who pays your fucking paycheck asshole! Many more fuck ups like this one and we will go elsewhere for our feel-good mindfuck mythology session! You are on notice little long-haired cross-carrying mister! Next loss is your omnipotent ASS on a pike fucker! Dig it! Now get your fucking ass back in the game and take one for the team! Oh, almost forgot…Amen!

 

YESS!!

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06:20 PM ET
 

This Oklahoma atheist isn’t thanking the Lord

By Jessica Ravitz, CNN

(CNN) – Behind her were ruins, a tangled mess where structures once stood. Cradled in her arms, the mother’s 19-month-old son played with a snatched microphone, unfazed by the chaos swirling around him. And in front of Rebecca Vitsmun stood CNN’s Wolf Blitzer, who – after asking her about the decision that saved her and her son’s lives – had one more question:

“I guess you got to thank the Lord, right?” he asked.

“Yeah,” she mumbled, smiling and looking down.

“Do you thank the Lord for that split-second decision?” he continued.

“I, I, I,” the 30-year-old stay-at-home mom stammered before adding, “I’m actually an atheist.”

She laughed, Blitzer laughed, and the moment passed seamlessly on live TV. Except it also became a clip heard across the Internet and social media – one that pointed to a reality about faith in America that exists even where, and when, people might least expect it.

Vitsmun, who chronicled her decision to flee her house with her son on CNN iReport, is one of 13 million atheists or agnostics in America, according to a 2012 report by the Pew Research Center’s Forum on Religion & Public Life.

See Rebecca Vitsmun discuss her decision with CNN’s Wolf Blitzer

While only 2.4% of Americans are atheists, they fit into a broader category that is on the rise in the United States.

Nearly 20% of adults – and a third of those under 30 – are religiously unaffiliated, the Pew report found.

This group, which has grown by roughly 5% in five years, is often referred to as the “nones.” It is a term that extends beyond atheists, who believe there is no God, and agnostics, who believe it’s impossible to prove or disprove God’s existence. It includes a greater proportion of people who see themselves as nothing in particular, which means they might be secular, spiritual or believers – but simply don’t identify with an organized religion, said Greg Smith, a senior researcher at the Pew Research Center

“When we ask people questions about their religious identity, when we ask them about their religious beliefs, there are relatively few who are atheists. But I’m speaking in percentage terms,” Smith said. “That doesn’t mean there aren’t lots of them around. And they’re certainly all over.”

Oklahoma included.

In fact, when the Pew Research Center last drilled down to uncover the religious landscape of affiliations on a state level five years ago, 12% of Oklahomans were religiously unaffiliated. And just as the numbers ticked up nationally since then, it stands to reason that they did the same in Oklahoma.

We tried to reach Vitsmun by phone Wednesday but were unable to connect.

Her friend Waylon Flinn, however, shed some light on who she is. She and her husband, who Flinn said is also an atheist, aren’t the sorts who advertise their beliefs or throw them in people’s faces. When she agreed to go on camera, it wasn’t for that platform; she didn’t even see the Lord question coming.

But that she responded to Blitzer the way she did is no surprise to Flinn, who opened his home in nearby Norman to Vitsmun’s family after theirs was destroyed.

“She handled it in her style, which is very honest and true to herself,” he said.

 
   – CNN Writer/Producer

Filed under: Atheism • Faith Now • iReport • News media